The night before I leave..

So here I sit. Actually, here I lie. I on my bed looking around my room and what will be my last time sleeping in this room for a while. Most likely 2 years and 3 months. I see my tv and dvd player that I will miss, my movies and books, my bed; but right now I am not thinking about missing any of that at all. People keep telling me about the things that they will miss and the food, but right now. Right before I leave. I am thinking about the people that I am going to miss.

Many people can vouch for me when I say this. I never wanted to come back to shelby county. I was done and all I had were mostly things that caused me bad memories from my angsty teenage years. But over these last two years I have met amazing people and had a chance to reevaluate things. I got to take a look back at all the things I thought I hated, but now I look back on and realize how charming some of the things are.

1. People care- I use to think that people only cared about the things you did and the clothes you wore so they could judge you without getting to know you. I do realize now that they only say and do things mostly because they generally care for your well being and want you to succeed in life. People here in general want good things to happen to you. So their "judgmental eye" alot of times is out of love.

2. People Change- I am definitely not the low self-esteem angsty teenager seeking approval that I was in high school. Another thing that I got to come back and realize. That kid who was always a jerk, probably might still be a jerk... but now everyone else thinks so too. That bad girl who use to get in fights with everyone.. now has a baby and a career and has put the past behind her. If you are still dwelling on how people use to be, give them a chance. Everyone changes, even you. Well that is all that I got for wisdom right now, its tired and blogger won't let me post things. I am to be up in 3 and a half hours for a plane flight.

A few shout outs:

Thank you bank workers for making me part of your guys family. It was not only a job, but it was alot of fun and I will miss you all dearly.

To my friends: I will miss our fun times and most of you aren't even in Indiana and I will still miss you! Send me and email. I can't wait to hear about your adventures as well. Miss you!

To my ex-roomates even the extra ones that might has well of been roommates: You guys were around for some of the hardest and best times of my life. We have been throught it all sickness, death, and family dramas. You should know you are not my friends, but my sisters. I will love you and miss you.

To my family.. I love all of you dearly and can't wait to hear about the special things that happen to all of you.

To my Mom.. Be strong, I Love you more than you will ever know and I know that you love me right back and I will feel that all the way in Africa even.

To my Dad... I will miss you and all the fun times we have together. Our "bonding nights" on Weds especially. I know they aren't the usual; but they will always be something special that we have and I will remember. Love you.

To my Brother: I love you and you will be successful in all that you do, I don't say this often, but I am proud of you and you are turning into a good man. I'm proud that your my brother.

Ok that concludes my love fest and my cry before I leave. Time for me to get focused. I have a busy two years in front of me.